Good to See You Again

I am not a tv person. God knows I've tried, subscribed to everything under the sun: Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, Discovery Plus, Disney Plus, Apple TV...

But I always end up frustrated, annoyed - flipping from show to show, restless.

I think my distaste for television links back to the good ole days of high school when Mom and I lived together - just the two of us - in Edmond, Oklahoma. Mom and Dad had just split and Mom was not a fan of TV, preferring instead to spend her hours memorizing the Bible, reading spiritual books, or cooking up her healthy concoctions in the kitchen. And so, we didn't have one. At one point, Dad suggested I take one of his spare tvs for my bedroom and so I did. I know Dad felt badly for me, felt I was steering too far from normalcy. And maybe I was, in hindsight. I wasn't a normal teenager, that's for darned sure - preferring elevator music on the radio rather than the current music of the day such as Michael Jackson, Def Leppard, or Ozzie Osbourne. 

Anyway, so I took that television and put it on the dresser of my bedroom, hooked up a set of rabbit ears and maneuvered them every which way until the static cleared and a station came into focus...

And then it just sat there. Instead of watching tv during those long evening hours, I preferred playing the piano, my fingers flying over the keys as the hours passed. I loved hanging out in the living room, book in hand, as I read into the wee hours of the night. I relished notebooks filled with made-up stories I created in my head and brought to life on paper, my hand unable to keep up with the lines that ran rampant in my head. Sometimes I would hear my friends talk about shows they watched in the evening and my interest piqued...but then when it came time to turn the tv on and tune into the show they were laughing about, or discussing as I listened with a bit of curiosity, I shrugged, walked away, and lavished myself with the quietude of the evening. Eventually I gave up and hauled that tv into the garage, heaved it up on a wide shelf, where it sat, dust covered and forlorn, until, a few years later, I returned it to my dad.

I have always preferred quiet reflection to raucous entertainment, the company of my own thoughts and imagination to that of others, the wisdom, entertainment, and solace found in the pages of a dog-eared book. But somehow I lost myself over the past many years of teaching and parenting and wife-ing. In the midst of raising a family, balancing a household, and managing a career, I only found time to complete the necessities of life before falling into bed at night...only to get up and do it again the next day.

But now? Well, the kids are grown. I'm finding myself lost in the long evening hours with more time than things to do. And so, I have fallen into the habit of seeking entertainment as so many others do - as my best friends and my sisters and my children and my husband - do. I have delved into series, watching several episodes in anticipation of finding the same delight that others do only to give it up after the third episode fails at piquing my interest. I have attempted to watch movies, searched Top Ten lists for something - anything  - that would prove worthwhile.

Meanwhile, a friend of mine - Laura - who started the book club I attend entered a contest and won an audio book for each member of the book club: The Four Winds. Skeptical, I downloaded my copy.

Of course I'd heard of audiobooks before but they never really interested me. When would I listen to them?  And so I chalked them up to an obsession of others that I knew I wouldn't share.

And then I started listening. The narrator was amazing - her voice perfectly encapsulating the character she was portraying. It wasn't long before I found myself longing for those moments when I could pop the earbuds in my ear and listen, her voice transporting me to the Dust Bowl in southern Texas while I cooked dinner, or to the migrant camps of California while I readied myself for bed. I couldn't get enough, devouring a 13 hour read in less than 3 days.

And then I just kept going, the books on my virtual shelves filling up as I explored titles, researched audio book options and participated in free trials.

A week or so ago, I shut down all of my tv apps. Good bye, Netflix...good bye, Hulu. My girls complained momentarily, as they've both used my account. Roy said, "You should keep paying for them if the girls enjoy them."

Nah, I shook my head. I have other plans for that money: audiobooks. 

And now the debate begins: Audible? Audiobooks? Scribd? So many options! So many audiobooks to explore! The choices are endless, the list of books I can't wait to listen to is growing exponentially.

And suddenly? Well suddenly I remember who I am - after all of these years. 

I had forgotten.

Why, hello, Vonda. It's good to see you again.